What really is "the good life"?

What really is "the good life"?

Hint ... it's not all about the bucks and stuff
By Debbie Gardner
PRIME Editor

What do you think of when you imagine yourself living "the good life?"

Do you see yourself living in a second home in a sunny clime? Overseeing a fat retirement fund? Having the time and wherewithal to travel the world unencumbered? Getting the opportunity to really do what you want? Living your life in continued good health? Having a social calender that's always full?

. maybe starting a new career or finding a new purpose for your life?

It seems everyone has a different definition of what it means to be happy.

And not surprisingly, it seems what we consider "the good life" changes as we move through life.

"At age 23, I've discovered that my idea of a good life is all about security. First and foremost, I want to have financial security - I want to be able to pay all my bills on time, and pay off my loans in a reasonable amount of time. I want to have money in the bank to pay for my wedding, a vacation and eventually to buy a home. I want to be able to work just one job to achieve these goals (not four).
Beyond the money, I think a good life means being surrounded by those you love - friends, family and pets. It means being able to get outside and enjoying the fresh air and a beautiful sunset (or sunrise). A good life is an active one, full of walks, runs, hikes, swims, etc. A good life is waking up each morning knowing that no matter what you do that day, it will be important to someone, even if it's only yourself." Courtney 23

A scientific look at a state of mind

Late last year, the Mature Market Institute (MMI), the research arm of MetLife Insurance, conducted a research poll with 1,001 individuals ranging in age from 45 to 74 on what constitutes "the good life".

From August to October, MMI employed the global market research firm Chadwick, Martin & Bailey to conduct interviews where respondents were asked to describe, in their own words, what the good life meant to them, if they felt they were living the good life now, and to what extent they felt their lives had purpose.

The resulting study, titled "Discovering What Matters: Balancing Money. Medicine and Meaning" found some common themes among respondents, regardless of age:

"The good life" was often described in terms of health, financial freedom, and time to do what is important.

Engaging in meaningful activities, and most importantly, spending time with family and friends, were top priorities for those who felt they were living "the good life."

Having a sense of purpose in life was crucial to overall happiness and the perception of living "the good life."

This sense of purpose in life relates to both at ability to develop a clear focus on what's important to the individual and a vision of the future an individual wants to enjoy.

Based on how the research subjects prioritized the elements collectively identified as constituting "the good life,"the MMI study grouped these individuals into five basic categories: "Meaning-Minded", "Balanced Individualists," "Balanced Givers," "Financially Focused and "Hyper Individualists."

"My father always says to me, "Life is good, but the 'good life' is better."
What this means is that life is good because we're alive and kickin' but the "good life" is better because we're fortunate in ways many others are not.
The good life means good health, wealth, happiness and success."
Katelyn 25, Katelyn's father is 51

What kind of "good lifer" are you?

According to "Discovering What Matters,", individuals classified as "Balanced Givers" were the largest group in the study. They tended to focus on activities that emphasized helping others as well as doing things that mattered to them personally. Balanced givers were generally younger, male and working full time with a moderate income. Forty-six percent were between the ages of 45 and 54.

Individuals classified as "Meaning-Minded" tended to focus on activities such as being with friends and family, enjoying their surroundings and enjoying personal interests. This group was mostly likely to be a female between the ages of 65-74, with good financial assets.

"Balanced Individualists," mostly younger males who were still working full-time, tended to focus more on activities that highlighted personal interests, such as taking care of their physical selves and pursuing personal interests. Meaning-related activities were still important, but to a lesser extent than the Meaning-Minded group.

Those respondents classified as "Financially Focused" spent a lot of time and energy building income, improving their salaries and increasing their net worth, with less attention directed to activities that enhanced personal or community meaning and purpose. Again, the majority of the respondents in this group were younger, and male.

"Hyper-Individualist" individuals were described as having a clear focus on their own needs and activities as opposed to activities with family, their community or spiritual community. The average age was 55 to 64. They were mostly male.

How our definition can change
In designing this study, Metlife relied heavily on the work of author, certified master career counselor and MMI advisor Richard Leider. The study drew heavily from Leider's most recent books, "Repacking Your Bags" and "The Power of Purpose."

In early February, Leider offered a free webinar based on the results of MMI's report, "Discovering What Matters."

PRIME was privileged to be able to listen in.
In the webinar, Leider looked at the results in the light of the current economic crisis, discussing how changes in employment, finances and other life stressors can be the catalyst that prompts an individual to "repack his bags" or reevaluate what he or she defines as "the good life."

"Forty-one percent of the people surveyed for "Discovering What Matters" were in flux or transition," Leider reported to the webinar attendees.

He said the key to achieving "the good life" is not in avoiding flux, but in how an individual copes when facing flux is "how we perceive or what we do with the trigger."

"In times of change we go higher and we go deeper .into what's core to our lives," he said.

That theme, Leider said, was clearly echoed by the MMI study.
"This study pointed out in no uncertain terms what's core [to happiness] and that's meaning [in one's life]," he said.

In essence, Leider said. it's purpose that makes people happy.
"The most contented people were . those that are living in the place where they belong, the place where they fit not just a nice surrounding with people they love, doing work that benefits others," Leider said.

It's really about love, belonging, work
"This study debunks the myth that the "good life" equals wealth," Leider said. "Money is important, medicine and health are important, but a purpose-driven life becomes more important [to happiness]."

This especially seems true as we age, as illustrated by the "good life" definition of "Meaning-Minded" individuals.

Leider said that the results outlined in "Discovering What Matters" also debunks the myth that happiness "equals the absence of misfortune.'

"Misfortune is part of life," he said. "We're always going to have misfortune, but it's how we get past this [that matters]."

This is where he said individuals need to "go back to their core" to find strength to survive and triumph over misfortune, be it a divorce, a job loss, or even a death.

The core, Leider said, is that set of beliefs and values each individual choose to live by; the things that matter most to them.

"Take those three biblical concepts love, belonging and work they are at the core of all major spiritual and religious practices in the world," he said. "These are universal truths."

And, according to the results in "Discovering What Matters," they are the true keys to happiness.

This study, Leider said, busts the myth that the "good life" means more.

"More money, more friends, more health .the 'good life' really comes from a balance," Leider said. "It means making some key decisions about where to lighten your load."

Or, as the MMI study put it, "achieving the "good life" often means "unpacking" your life's bag and finding focus on the "actions and practices that will help [you] do what matters most in [your] life, and repacking" with a clear picture and plan of "where [you] want to go."

"The consistent message is that the importance [of purpose] is universal" Leider said. "But it hits people at different times and at different triggers."

"My version of the good life is living in a healthy, mindful manner. It consists of keeping family and friends close, meaningful employment, really good food, interests to keep your mind busy, community involvement, being aware of the world around you, regular exercise, making the most of your talents and if possible, laughing daily!" Liz - 49